Two weeks ago, my little gerber turned a year old. I haven't felt sad. I've felt relieved and overjoyed. I cannot believe we survived. There were times I didn't think we would and there were times, quite frankly, I didn't want to. But I serve a BIG God and I prayed over him and over our relationship multiple times and I am seeing some of God's grace and mercy. He is now taking a bottle and I don't care if he keeps it until he's 5! Don't get me wrong, he's still breastfeeding for nourishment but where my breast used to be the ONLY thing that soothes him, if it's not time to feed or he's not completely inconsolable I can give him 2 ounces of coconut milk and hold him off for awhile and that is HUGE! He is now walking. Yes, that means he's into EVERYTHING! He loves nothing more than playing in the toilet, the garbage can and under Papi's desk but whatever, at least he isn't crying. He's COMPLETELY OBSESSED with Mickey and his big brother's got him a Mickey Mouse for his birthday that has helped him go to sleep without crying (why didn't we do this MONTHS ago?!?). He's saying a few words but he TOTALLY understands EVERYTHING! He nods his head yes or no when you ask him questions! He eats EVERYTHING and just loves nothing more than animal crackers, avocados and spaghetti. Big brothers are back in school. PreK-4 this year and they are gone for 5 hours a day. They're having a hard time adjusting but I love this time with Zeek and him and I are slowly finding our routine. He's cutting one year molars and has had a little cold this week but he's been a trooper. He even napped 1.5 hours on the couch yesterday which never EVER happens!
The twins are completely obsessed with space. The facts that they have learned watching youtube videos amazes me. So we've now challenged them to learn all the states and their capitals. They get a dollar if they know all the states and another dollar if they know all the capitals. But so far, they prefer to keep their planet videos on repeat. Whatever, it's educational! HAHA! They're having a little anxiety with school this year. It's hard for me - they're in the same school, same teacher, even a few of the same classmates but just more time. But they are struggling. They like it while they're there but they have a hard time WANTING to go. It's only two weeks in. They miss some of their friends from last year who have moved on to kindergarten. But, they'll get over it! We set up a play date tomorrow with one of their best buddies from last year so hopefully that will help a bit.
I have stepped into leadership at MOPS again this year as the MOPPET Coordinator. That is basically the person who handles all the organization for the childcare and fills in if a volunteer cannot be there. It's not an easy task but God has been calling me there for a few years and I've been running and hiding from that calling. Last year was such a hard year with Ezekiel and he NEVER wanted to leave me and I didn't want to go to MOPS even though I NEEDED it because I felt so bad about what I was dealing with where he was concerned. I was frustrated and embarrassed that it was "my kid." But from the darkness God brings light and he's give me such compassion for moms with kids that just think their mommy is the BEST mommy in the world and cannot be without them. We live in such a judging world. When a kid is screaming everyone thinks "what did that mom do to her kid now?" Instead of taking a minute to pray for that mom. You don't know her struggles, her sleep deprivation and most likely her desperate desire to soothe her child. Just lift her up. This year, I stepped bravely into this role because I want all the moms at MOPS of Miami to enjoy the meeting and get the most out of it that they can in two hours so they can feel refreshed and rejuvenated and be encouraged as a mom and as a wife. If their baby is loosing it in childcare, they can't relax! I hope to have 40 best friends who trust me to check on their babies and let them know they're okay so they can get a recharge. And God has blessed me in return. As long as he doesn't see me, Zeek is finally going to child care and playing and not completely loosing it. THANK YOU LORD!
Erik is still working on this big project in North Miami. He's gone 12 hours a day and it's been a huge adjustment for all of us. We're all looking forward to the end of it, sometime around November. In the meantime, I pray for him daily and I'd be grateful too if you'd lift him up. He's got a lot on his plate and I know he's trying to find the balance and keep God at the center of all of it. We all know that can be such a struggle when we're a little overwhelmed.
Speaking of God, Cira started the bible study "A Woman after God's Own Heart" with some of us and we never really got to get deep into it much less finish it. So I've challenged myself to go through it alone. It's been a struggle but God has since blessed me with Zeek waking between 5/5:30am each day and while I'm so tired, I realize He's just training me to start my day right and I'm able to do my study and pray while Zeek watches Mickey. God is good all the time. And this study is convicting me and challenging me in all areas of my life. So much change to make but as long as I keep HIM above all others, I know that there will be a positive outcome.
Guys, having three sons isn't for the weak. God has such a funny sense of humor. I grew up three girls. We grew up with princesses and barbie dolls and dress up. I didn't want to wear shoes if they didn't click when I walked or dresses if they didn't fan out when I spinned. I don't have the first clue about wrestling and ninja turtles and eating us out of house and home and all the things I face. But by the grace and mercy of God, I am learning and I have three little JOYS! It was such a tough first year with Ezekiel. And the twins are entering a challenging time too as they transition with school this year and as Erik has been gone more. I have no idea what the future holds. I know that it won't always be easy but I know that God has called me in this season of life to be a wife and a mom and he has and will continue to equip me. Praying has been a struggle for me my whole life but I have challenged myself to grow in that area. And I am praying over EVERYTHING. Even cleaning my house! (Y'all seriously I HATE house cleaning and I'm TERRIBLE at it but...) I was able to get some housework done yesterday and even though it didn't last long, I know I accomplished it and I know it'll get easier with time.
"The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish tears it down with her own hands." Proverbs 14:1
What are you doing today to build your home? If nothing else, I encourage you to pray over it. Pray over your family, your home, the roof that protects you, the meals you serve at your table. Pray over it all. Nothing is meaningless to God.
